Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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