K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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