omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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