You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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