So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
