How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
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