I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
