I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
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