the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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