...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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