Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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