Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize