I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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