i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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