ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
