I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
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