how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I think your dad took our porno
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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