my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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