i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
