We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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