bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Randomize
