3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Porn is love you can see.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I need a beard to bite.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
