This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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