dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
