can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
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