It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize