I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I wish I only lived at night.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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