We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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