Do vagina's smell?
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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