Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Semen is not good for contacts.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize