just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
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