i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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