Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
