this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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