you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
