he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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