my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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