My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
