you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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