Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
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