I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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