used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Randomize
