Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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