The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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