I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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