After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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