chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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