oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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