Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
