im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize